10 Bad Tinder Profiles in Penang

What can you learn from a bad tinder profile? A lot as it happens – especially when I’m dedicating this entire chunk of my website to what these bad profiles say to me (as a girl swiper with a lot of Tinder history) .

So here’s the crème de la crème of godawful pics and bios which I’m sharing for the educational purposes of males on this site…

Location: Penang, Malaysia

Not in Malaysia? Check out all the bad tinder profiles in Taipei, Taiwan… 

Note to self: Writhing naked in clay, putting a gun to your head and seductively chewing a dead insect are NOT the best way to get your right swipes. Top marks for *Ahem* thinking outside the box though. Here’s some dates I went on here with people who had saner looking profiles. 

Anyway, here’s my top 10 for this week:

Bad Tinder Profile 1: Despacito

bad tinder profile despacito

Bad Tinder Profile 2:  Not tryna force you but…

bad tinder profile swipe or I'll shoot

Bad Tinder Profile 3:  The #butterflyunicorngoat

bad tinder profile butterfly

Bad Tinder Profile 4: The Werewolf

bad tinder profile the werewolf

Bad Tinder Profile 5: The Toilet Lurker

bad tinder profile toilet mirror selfie

Bad Tinder Profile 6: Scorpius

bad tinder profile guy eating scorpion

Bad Tinder Profile 7: The Batman

bad tinder profile batman

Bad Tinder Profile 8: Mr Walrus

bad tinder profile walrus mustache

Bad Tinder Profile 9: The Crab

bad tinder profile crab

And my personal favourite…

Bad Tinder Profile 10: The Writhing Crab In Clay

bad tinder profile clay crab

Soooo… What can we learn from this goldmine of info?

  1. Have pictures of yourself – Like you, the actual human
  2.  Use your own name
  3. Write a bio that doesn’t sound like you’re shouting

I can hear guys in the background saying “Yeah but I do all that, I don’t have a crazy ass profile like the ones above and still don’t get any matches” – Fear not; a detailed article on hacking swipes for guys is COMING SOON. Yeah this is pretty basic stuff, but the saddest thing is that I really didn’t have to swipe far to get these 10 lovelies. So if you’re reading this and have a toilet mirror selfie, do yourself and the tindersphere a favour and GET RID OF IT. Thank you.

Feel free to leave some comments below and check out my latest #travelating advice on dating safety – the guy with a gun to his head in particular should pay attention to this…

Anyway, find more bad tinder profiles in ‘The Male Profile’ section of my site. Remember, it’s all educational…


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  1. hertraveltherapy says:

    Omg some of these are truly dreadful. I wonder if they ever actually have any success with them, or if it’s just a dumb joke.

    1. Zainab says:

      Would be interesting to know. I should have right swiped and asked…

  2. Hahaha I cant stop laughing! Ok its not nice making fun of people…haha! “Have you ever made love with a bat?” LOL.

    Well, they all are originals and it does capture peoples attention.


    1. Zainab says:

      It does indeed 😉

  3. Joanna Davis says:

    I never understood Tinder and the need to show off like that on a social network. There might be some happy endings on Tinder but most of the messages you get though it are just disrespectful and gross (especially the photos)

    1. Zainab says:

      Yes, there’s stuff like this but I do meet lots of perfectly normal and nice people too… I mean, you can kind of tell the people who will give you nasty messages before and hopefully swipe left on them.

  4. Lily says:

    Omg, I never used Tinder and now I’m scared to think of people who do so

    1. Zainab says:

      Haha most people who use it are normal I assure you! Just some interesting cases like these are also out there..

  5. kaidigger says:

    Lol that was hilarious, i nevre used Tinder but it looks interesting to find people, this post is amazing.

    1. Zainab says:

      Haha thanks! Glad you enjoyed the read – you should so use it just for a laugh!

  6. Yukti says:

    Oh this Tinder looks so scary and ugly. I never use them and would also recommend that not to use.

    1. Zainab says:

      Well… You don’t see 99.5% of the people on it so it’s fun to browse through for a laugh anyway. And some profiles are actually good, so it’s safe to go on a fun date if you follow the key rules in my dating safety article 🙂

  7. These profiles are absolutely shocking and personally I can’t see how anyone would be attracted to them.

    1. Zainab says:

      Well they are the worst ones that I handpicked. Some of them might be normal/nice guys, but don’t know how to make a good profile. Poor guys..

  8. ojandcigs says:

    Wow this post is hilarious! I’ve been in a steady relationship for 6 years so have never used Tinder, but man this makes me want to browse just for fun lmaoo

    1. Zainab says:

      Haha you should! Let your partner know beforehand though and go through it with them maybe! That would be pretty funny…

  9. Aditi says:

    OMG! I have never been on Tinder but always keep on hearing about it from somewhere or the other. But, your post is the most informative of all, if you what I mean 😉 Thanks for the laugh of the day. 😀 😀

    1. Zainab says:

      Haha glad you found it ‘informative’!! And I’m happy it made you laugh :). I mean it’s not all that bad, but we get this a lot…

  10. Haha! this is so hilarious. I dont really like this kind of chats. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Zainab says:

      Glad you found it funny 🙂

  11. Hahaha .. Yes people do these type of things to be different and end up in blacklist of many !

    1. Zainab says:

      Yeah I’m sure there are loads of girls with weirdo profiles too!

  12. Kavita Singh says:

    hahaha..interesting 😀 I cant stop laughing. thanks for this funny post.

    1. Zainab says:

      Haha thanks Kavita! Glad it made you laugh 🙂

  13. Ana Ojha says:

    I enjoyed reading your post! Thank God! I found my soulmate without using Tinder!

    1. Zainab says:

      Haha they’re not all that bad! Just people don’t know how to make a good profile – I’m doing an article on this! Glad you enjoyed the read 🙂

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